June 2017 Newsletter

Fundamentals
We now custom schedule Fundamentals and Fast Track courses to fit your schedule! Your friend that keeps promising to start next week just lost another excuse. Call, email, and send your friends our way.  We schedule free intros throughout the week and pride ourselves on making everyone of any ability level feel comfortable and get started with CrossFit the right way.

Announcement
It’s Hot!  Stay hydrated and bring a case of water to share!

Olympic Lifting Class
Mondays and Thursdays @ 6:30 pm
To really learn and become proficient at the complicated Olympic lifts, you really need to practice often. We have decided to expand the Olympic Lifting class to two nights a week!  Join Coach Jeff on Monday and Thursday nights at 6:30 pm.  This class is open to all CFI athletes and is a great opportunity to get some specialized practice on your Olympic lifts (Clean and Jerk and the Snatch).

Housekeeping
Friendly Reminder: If a class is in session in 115B and you’d like to lift, workout, or otherwise do your own thing, please use 115C (the eastern half of the gym). This reduces distractions for the class and makes it easier for the coach to manage space and communicate to the class. We want you to use the gym all you want. So whenever a class is in session or within 30 minutes of starting, just head into 115C and lift and burpee all day and night until your heart is content.

Upcoming Events

Swolis and Clark Expedition
June 24th @ 9am
This is an annual tradition when CrossFit Impulse athletes get to experience some outdoor fun in Huntsville.  Get ready to push, drag, carry, and float our beloved logs through Indian Creek!  Please no younger children.  See the “Upcoming Training” section for more info and feel free to ask your coaches.

Grace for the Games
July 8th @ 9am

This is it, guys. Neale made it to the big time. For the past three years he has put in countless hours at the gym, refusing to act his age and slip quietly into the nursing home, and crushed all the 20-something year-old men in his path. And that path has led to the CrossFit Games where he will compete against the top 20 masters athletes in the world!

But making it to the Games comes with a hefty price. You must travel to Madison, Wisconsin. Stay there for almost a week. And take time off work to do it. I don’t know if you’re familiar with Wisconsin, but it’s almost in Canada. It’s that far away. And I’m pretty sure they speak French.

So we’re gonna support Neale’s trip in the most boring way possible—financially. He didn’t ask for help. But we offered.

Here’s where you come in. You’re gonna sign up to compete at this dank fundraiser. We’re gonna give you a barbell, let you throw it over your head 30 times quickly, and whoever can make the fastest exercise will win a huge, custom trophy. Actually, the *three* fastest men and *three* fastest women will all get huge custom trophies! This is going to be an item for your mantle that your loved ones will fight over when you’re dead. You can’t put a price on that.

The workout is “Grace.” You perform 30 Power Clean and Jerks as quickly as you can. You’ll have a judge, and the judge will make you do it right, but get your mind right…this is a fundraiser. This is not The CrossFit Games. That’s where Neale is going–not you. So relax and have fun with this. Spend $25 to help a friend, have a good time, and you might even get a prize.

Jeff is going to be the head judge, and if he spots any funny business with reps that shouldn’t count, he’s just gonna spray your barbell with melted Kerrygold butter. And it’s the salted kind. The salted butter is terrible. So do your reps right or get your bar buttered in the middle of Grace.

If competing isn’t your thing, then make a donation. Any amount would be awesome. You make a donation just like you buy a ticket. Donations are listed as a type of ticket. So you’ll pay some money, but you’re not actually getting anything in return—like Astrology. But instead of Miss Cleo, your donation will go to help your buddy Neale. So dig out those (electronic) twenty-dollar bills, those fifty-dollar bills, and those hundred-dollar bills. Be generous. Big donations help so much!

And we absolutely must have volunteers to help run this. And I need to know who my volunteers are before gameday. So after you make that donation, register as a volunteer. I promise it will be fun and painless.

This is community, fellas–helping our friends when it’s their turn. This is Neale’s turn. Let’s show him the love and put some gas in his tricycle so he can make it to Wisconsin.

Click here to sign up or donate!

Upcoming Training
June concludes our Strongman training block. I hope you have enjoyed lifting things other than barbells, since that is primarily what the world is made of. Thanks for your patience as we work strongman implements into your classes, sometimes in a limited way. The strongman implements are always available for you to use in open gym in 115C. Most of them live in the storage shed. If you are willing to put them back when you’re done then you are welcome to use them anytime. If you’re ever feeling a bit burned out but still want to lift something, a keg or the metal log may be just what you need. Anybody can do Grace. Can you do Grace with a 112/70# stone? A keg? A 115/90# log? Need something heavy but you feel like you’ll die if you squat or bend over? Try a yoke carry or a farmer’s carry. But please do set up so you don’t damage the implements. Kegs cannot be dropped forcefully, and atlas stones must be used inside with three layers of rubber between them and the floor. If you have any questions, I am always happy to show you how to use the strongman equipment.

June’s benchmark workouts are DT and Barbara. Look up your times from April and get ready to see how much fitter you’ve become!

One of my favorite gym adventures of the year is coming up on Saturday, June 24th: The Swolis and Clark Expedition! This is where we get into Indian Creek and move from Creekwood Park all the way back to the gym. Oh, and we carry, flip, float, and otherwise wrangle a few logs with us for the journey. This is a relaxed, fun adventure. We move as fast as we like, and we rest when we need to. It’s a bit of work, but I wouldn’t call it a workout. There’s no scaling necessary. Everyone of any fitness level can join in. So if that sounds like your idea of a good time (and it should if you’re not dead inside) then arrive at the gym at 8:45am. We will select the appropriate logs based on attendance and then carpool to Creekwood Park to begin. The whole excursion usually takes less than 2 hours, and it’s just an awesome time. While we won’t be doing much actual swimming–it’s more wading really– we will be transitioning between ankle deep and neck deep water constantly. So regrettably, if you can’t swim, this isn’t the adventure for you. But I look forward to seeing the rest of you on Saturday morning!
Be on the Look Out for Information

-Annual Rock climbing trip to Chattanooga- August

– Ninja Warrior Obstacle Course Field Trip September

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